Mike and Kathy have been married for 15 years. They have two children, Justin, 12, and Heather, 10. Mike has a small business which he started a few years ago. Kathy works as a nurse at a local hospital. They have grown apart over the past few years and their marriage is ending.
Kathy doesn't understand why Mike insists on spending so much time with the children since the separation. She had encouraged him to spend more time with the kids before, but he always seemed to busy with his business. She feels he just wants to spend the extra time with them now so he doesn't have to pay as much child support.
Mike feels like Kathy is trying to keep the children away from him. Since the separation he's realized how important Justin and Heather are to him. He's afraid he's going to lose his children, and his business in the divorce. He and Kathy can't seem to talk without it turning into an argument. Mike and Kathy can't imagine that they can resolve their differences. Both are convinced they are going to spend thousands of dollars on attorneys fees and many months or even years of emotional turmoil before their divorce is concluded. It doesn't have to be that way.
Mike and Kathy have many common interests which they are unable to recognize; most significantly among those, Justin and Heather. They cannot talk to each other because, like many couples, they are communicating on different levels. Each cannot hear what the other is saying.
Neither Kathy nor Mike have much hope when they begin mediation. However, with the help of a skilled, caring mediator, Kathy and Mike begin to hear each other. The mediator can assist them in recognizing their common interest. He can also help them focus on the their future, not their past.
The end result is the successful settlement of their case. Mike and Kathy have saved thousands of dollars on attorneys fees. They have also saved Justin and Heather from the potential long-term impact of the trauma of a contested divorce.